Travel Essays
the Americas

FIND BATHROOMSADD BATHROOMSAWARDSABOUTPARTNERSESSAYSMEDIASHOPPRIVACYCONTACT

Updated 2005
Somewhere between Houston and Austin , USA , 1999 
     I rode my bike in the MS150 from Houston to Austin in 2 days. I was riding along by myself and I had to go to the bathroom bad. I had no idea when the next rest stop would be so I pulled over at a gas station along the road. 
     They said the did not have a toilet but there was an out-house out back. I walked around back and there it was. A little wooden shack, but I was desperate. I of course had no toilet paper so I had to "drip dry". There was no toilet seat, only a wooden step with a circle cut out of it. The wood was old and splintery and I was afraid I would get stuck or it would collapse on me if I sat down. 
     After this, I appreciated the port-a-potties provided for us.

Puerta Vallarta , Mexico , 2001
     This happened to me while in P.V. with my husband and brother in law and his wife. We had been trekking all over the town for a couple of hours and found ourselves in a rather unsavory neighborhood. It began to pour and because we were all tired and thirsty we decided to go into a bar that we normally wouldn't have entered. It was actually very nice, but filled with rather rough looking locals. We decided to have a warm-up drink and be on our way. After we were seated I went to the bathroom, which was nice and clean and had a locking stall and toilet paper. I was pleasantly surprised, as quite often this is not the norm.
     As I was sitting and doing my business I felt something on my foot. Looking down I saw the biggest cock-a-roach I had ever seen (keep in mind that being from Canada I have never seen cockroaches before, except on trips to Mexico and never on my body!)crawling up my bare leg. I immediately let out an window shattering scream that any ""Scream Queen"" from movies like Friday The Thirteenth or any other such movie would be proud of while simultaneously leaping from the toilet and pulling up my underwear and shorts. I was in such a rush to get out of the stall and so freaked out that I was emitting short little (but very loud) screams as I crashed headlong into the locked door and fumbled with the lock. 
     Finally out of the stall I could still feel the monstrous bug crawling on me. I flew screaming out of the washroom, jumping up and down and batting at my legs. I saw the critter on my foot and kicked my leg straight out as hard as I could, sending both the terrorised cockroach and my sandal flying about twenty feet through the bar, over the heads of the other startled patrons and right into a fountain in the courtyard. At the same time, my husband and brother-in-law came flying around the corner and crashed into me. They had heard my screams (as I am sure everyone in P.V. had) and come running thinking I was being attacked by a demented psychopath with a large knife. When everything calmed down and I had retrieved my sandal from the fountain people were asking what happened. We managed to explain although our Spanish isn't very good and everyone in the bar laughed uproariously at me. Needless to say, upon returning to our table I was in quite a rush to leave...

Barrow, Alaska
   I was visiting the home of my two new buddies, (two men who shared a house) and asked to use their bathroom. They were quite embarrassed as their toilet looked like a normal western toilet, except that it wasn't connecting to any pipes and didn't flush. Inside was a plastic bag, and this particular bag was full to the brim. Once a week you put all of your "honey bucket" bags outside and a truck came and picked them up.

Panama/San Blas Islands Toilet
  Off the Eastern (Atlantic) side of Panama are the San Blas Islands. They are very tiny, tropical, Caribbean islands and populated and controlled by the Cuna Indians. A "main" island has the Panama Govt. control point, school and art cooperative. Most of the islands have tropical shacks. Bathrooms, mostly for the tourists, often visiting from cruise ships, are small huts out on the end of a short pier with a hole underneath. I'm told that the natives just, "-swim out from shore a short way."  Swimming in the area of a habitation may be unhealthy.

Honduras 2002
     I went with my church on a mission trip to Honduras .  We took a day off and went to the beach at El Tigre. After spending the day their we took a boat back inland and I had to go to the bathroom before our 1 1/2 hr trip back to Choleteca. I told my leader that I HAD to go to the bathroom and when I say that he knows I mean business.  We went and asked a local restaurant that said they didn't have one (weird) but they gave me directions where to walk to ask someone. 
     I got confused and asked my leader to come with me. So together we found it and asked permission to use them. Stupidly of me I did not bring my own TP so I was definitely without. It was very gross! They were little stalls outside in the street made of rotting wood. The floor was cement but there were tons of bugs inside. There was no seat (not that I would have sat on it). I made it quick but it was hard since I was wet and the air was humid. After I was done we started to leave but the lady made us pay 5 limpiras(! not much $) but I am sure she was just taking advantage of us. When you gotta go you gotta go but I hope I never have to go there again.

Fresh Air in the Bolivian Desert
      On an overnight bus ride through Southern Bolivia , a friend and I had  intentions to not let our bladders get the best of us for the good 8 hours till
our arrival in the next city. Unfortunately, we failed, and going potty was a  must. We , of course were seated in the back of the bus,. and when the bs  stopped at 3 AM for a break,. we had to crawl over everyone sleeping in the  aisles just to get off.  
     Upon our meeting with the desert night, we asked where we should go to do our business, we knew that there would be no toilet, and  peeing in the wilderness, by this time in our trip, was no big deal. But the woman responded "al aire no mas," in "the air no more".. and we proceeded to look for a small wall, rock,. something,. no go. There we peed,. "al aire" in the cold night air,. surrounded by our fellow bus passengers. What a night.

JFK Airport , New York , USA
     This story comes 3rd hand, but I feel it extremely plausible.  It relates to the letting of a contract for the upkeep of the bathroom facilities within the purview of the New York Airport Authority.  As the story was related, this is specifically related to the JFK airport.  It seems that the "management" body saw fit to go out for an international bid to service the authority's needs.  High on the list of problems to be addressed was the malodorous state of the gentlemen's urinal facilities.  As I heard it, the winning bid, submitted by the company that oversees the facilities at Amsterdam's Schiphol airport, snagged the contract by, among other benefits, demonstrating that Schiphol's gentlemen's bathrooms were some of the most fragrant public facilities one could find.
     At the Schiphol urinals, they have engraved the image of a fly towards the base of the urinals in a particularly, how shall I say, "flow friendly" location.  Gentlemen reading this will immediately recognize the challenge of "hitting the target".  In this case, a "hit" minimizes "spills" and consequently minimizes their malodorous effects, so they have clean(er) bathrooms (than most public facilities).
     You have to wonder, at least I have to wonder, if this is so effective, why should I need to go to New York or Amsterdam to hit a fly.

 Panama Bathrooms
  In 1975 I was stationed in the Canal Zone while in the United States Military and in  reading your you site it brought back memories I would like to forget, but since I remembered I might as well share them. I was downtown Panama City shopping when of course the unexpected feeling of a major movement came upon me. It should be noted I had been in the Zone some time and had thought my stomach had become accustomed to the local food but I was big time wrong.
  I ran into a bar located on a side street and upon going inside, I knew I had screwed up because as a military person I noticed this bar had been listed as off limits however when nature calls you sometimes have no other choice the to take the chance of a Court Marshal.
  Once finding the bathroom and sitting down to do my business the local police and the Military Police must have came in because all of a sudden there were six others three males and three females in the stall with me. As I sat there I had no other choice but to finish what I was doing which was not a very pretty picture to say the least with the females speaking Spanish and pointing at me and the three male soldiers making comments about my last meal.
  Well the authorities must have left after some time and there was a mad rush out of the bathroom with the soldiers who had been in the stall with me running from the bar outside. To this day I am still not sure if they ran from the bar because of the smell or the Military Police who might come back

Costa Rica
  I read about your web site on USATODAY and thought it was silly, but then I remembered my experience in a very high-class nightclub in San Jose, Costa Rica. I went in the bathroom and there’s a woman sitting at the front with all kinds of toiletries including toilet paper, when I walked in she handed me one square and told me if I needed more there was a charge, I couldn’t believe it what are you suppose to do with a square? Of course I bought more.  So in reality this is probably a great site.

Guatemala
  The International Airport in Guatemala City had the only bathroom I have not been able to use because it was so dirty and smelled so bad.  Hopefully that has changed.

New York Sh*ty
  In my youth, on a night out with the boys and taking the subway home, I needed to relieve myself. As it was after midnight the subway men's room was closed. I guess it was decided by those who ran public transit in the 70's that men did not have to relieve themselves after midnight.
  My construction worker friend took out a credit card, a rare item to have on one's person in those days, juggled it in the lock of the men's room door and gained entry and we were able to take care of the business nature inflicted upon mankind during a night of  beer drinking. As we shook the last of it off, an N.Y.P.D. Officer entered and arrested us for breaking and entering using a "criminal tool". He remarked "you'd have been better off to piss on the tracks".
  Little did we know this Officer would be educator to this city for the next several decades. New York City now a complete and total public urinal in its parks and nooks and crannies as well as out in the open may in fact be the most difficult place in America to find a public place to relieve one's self. Parent's now teach their children how to pee along its sidewalks. Entering a coffee shop and politely asking to use their facilities gets you a response of "buy some coffee". Duh, but I am trying to get rid of my bodily liquid not add more. But, in an over crowded, out of control metropolis where bullsh*t seems to prevail what else is one to expect.

Honduras
  While travelling in Honduras, I was visiting a school and needed to use the facilities.  I was directed towards the back to a wooden shack with two stalls on either side of a cement water barrel full of greenish-looking water.   Sitting in front of this tank was a plastic bucket that had certainly seen better days.  You were supposed to dip the bucket in the water and take it inside the loo with you because these toilets were of the non-flushing variety.
  There was no way on this earth I was going to touch that bucket, so my friend very carefully collected my flushing water for me and I stepped inside one small closet with a cement floor that I swear I saw mushrooms growing out of.  I turned around to close the door, only to find that the door to the stall was simply a detached piece of wall that you had to pick up and place in front of the doorway!   There were considerably wide gaps between the rough boards making up the four walls and the "door," but I did my business anyway, gingerly using the "hover" technique to pee in the porcelain bowl (no seat, but I wouldn't have used it anyway if it was the last one on this earth).
  No tp, of course, but luckily, where I go, my tp goes.  It never leaves my side!  When I was finished, I poured the bucket water in the bowl and without watching to see if it had worked or not, busted out of the "door" to the amusement of two schoolchildren in the yard, flung the bucket aside, and sprinted for my Purell, of which I used at least half the container. 
  I will never again, as long as I live take America for granted-- not for its freedom, not for its democracy, but for its good, clean WC's!

Carl’s Corner, between Hillsboro and Waxahachie, Texas, USA
  Apparently a very popular truck stop back in the 70's, due to big chain truck stop's Carl's Corner has gotten seedy and creepy. They have 5 or so individual bathrooms with sink, toilet urinal etc. Usually dirty, smelly, with the classic garbage bag over the urinal. Doors usually have broken knobs and won't lock.  Pretty safe during the day, bar on premises brings some strange folks in at night (keep the kids and wife away).  Possible America's Most Wanted fugitive sighting.  Has a unique character never the less. Friendly employees, and generally no waiting for those critical moments.  A very unique piece of Interstate Americana. Would use again.  Hard to rate it good or bad, would avoid if cleanliness is a must.  

Laguna Beach , California , USA
A few years ago the woman in my husband's family decided to go to the new Ritz Carlton in Laguana Beach , CA for one of our birthday parties.
     The lunch was lovely... but when I went into the stall in the beautiful bathroom...there was a nasty surprise waiting for me.  The floor is a marble and the lighting is low...and I stepped in "S___t"!  Someone had not made it to the seat...or maybe they didn't like their lunch and were getting revenge.
      I let out a scream...and someone sent for someone...
      My shoe was ruined...edge of my pant leg was messed up.  I would have thought that the staff would have bent over backward to try to "fix" this.  They did not!
     In fact they made no effort to smooth my very upset feelings.
     This has fixed forever in my mind what happened at the Ritz! 

  Missouri , USA
     I think I already added my short story to my description of the public toilet located at Matson , Missouri , on the KATY Trail .  I am a member of a civic group called The Greenway Network which lobbied to acquire the old railroad rightaway which has become the KATY Trail complete with the serviceable pit toilet located at theMatson site which somewhat unique because of the 2 acre parking area complete with pit toilet.  There is an adjacent restored farm house which has various vending machines located under shelter by the old barn.  The area has remained remarkable clean and there is even a can crusher hanging on a post next to the soda machine where we even smashed beer cans that people pick up along the trail.
     Your site is interesting because we have found that the little block building pit toilet is actually a focal point for activity in this historic rural area which is only about 20 miles from urban St. Louis, Missouri but because of access limited by narrow roads and the Missouri River is centuries old in viewscape.  There is a 1799 stone building in corn field visible from the Matson pit toilet and Daniel Morgan Boone's overlooks the site.
     Actually there is another interesting focal point pit toilet located downstream about 25 miles at the confluence of the Missouri , Mississippi , and Wood River where Lewis and Clark started their famous journey but that is another story as well as toilet.  hty 8/17/01

Boston , Massachusetts USA
    Being a person with a chronic gastrointestinal illness, I have always used the bathroom a lot. When I go out I like to know exactly where the nearest facilities are for my own sake. You can't imagine some of the stories I could tell!
     One in particular always makes me laugh. I had just been picked up for a first date with a man I really liked. While we were driving to the restaurant I began to get cramps in my stomach. I was hoping to wait until I got to the restaurant but the pain of holding it was becoming worse.
     Luck was definitely on my side because we ended up driving through the neighborhood that I grew up in and was going by my old street. I suddenly asked if he wouldn't mind stopping at a friend of mine’s house.   I said I had been meaning to go by and pick something up for sometime. He had no problem with that.
     I ended up running through the front door (almost knocking over my friend's father),and running for the bathroom, trying to explain on my way up his staircase. At the time there was a living room full of company and a few who did not know me. They where horrified at my entrance, but my friend explained that this was normal. He also told his guests that he does not mind me coming over since I tend to leave $50 on the back of the toilet when I'm done. (He was only kidding) When I was finally relieved I returned to my date. Turns out he wasn't worth my time in the first place.

Caribbean Cruise
     In 1999, my mother and I were on a cruise in the Caribbean . I would tell her that on cruise ships, there was always a john when and wherever you needed it; except on one day I got the trots.  I headed for the nearest bathroom and it was closed. I headed to another one. This one was closed also.  I started for the one near our meeting room, when I saw my handsome friend talking to my mother. I didn't want him to see me in this condition, so I ducked back in the hallway, ran down the steps and made a beeline for my cabin. When I finished "business", the toilet wouldn't flush. I tried to flush several times but thinking this was my day for an embarrassment, I gave up.  I met some passengers on the way back to rejoin my mother and I told them that the john in my cabin wasn't working.  I got the word that ALL the toilets on the ship were out of order.

My Mexican Honeymoon
  My Mexican honeymoon was spent largely in the restroom so I got to be quite familiar with my hotel's facilities.  Unfortunately for my husband and I, our hotel had particularly bad sewage problems evidenced by the sulfurous smelling gas and the steam our toilet (even in our room!) emitted.  Imagine having to spend any time on that WC in a foul smelling room with a warm, damp behind positioned on the pot.  Our hotel's bathrooms had numerous other problems but that was definitely the most memorable.

The World’s Worst Job
  While visiting the Mayan ruins at Chichen Itza I had to visit the ladies room.  When I arrived at the door there was a sign advising me NOT TO FLUSH in very explicit terms.  When I went inside there was a little old lady who, it turned out, had the job of sizing up your needs and doling out what she felt were the appropriate sheets of toilet paper for you.  Then, at intervals she would look into each toilet and decide if they were full enough to require flushing.  It sure made my job look better (some days).

Mexico
  After having read the above-mentioned stories, my story about the bathrooms in some of the remote areas in Mexico is mild in comparison.  I have often wondered just "what" the Mexicans DO with the toilet seats in Mexico.  One of the worse that I "visited" was in a remote restaurant in Mexico that did not have a toilet seat, no toilet paper (of course), no soap to wash one's hands and of course, no towels to dry one's hands.  I can "hover" over a toilet with no problem and now carry a bottle of hand sanitizer (Purell) at all times.  Even in this USA, I have found that it often comes in handy.  Gas stations are the worse.  Some of the newer all purpose stations have exceptionally clean WCs.  Please, someone tell me just WHY some women have to pee on the seat and just why they cannot, at least dry off the pee after they have finished

My Venezuelan Adventure
  About 10 years ago my dad took our family on a cruise that included Mexico and South America. The day prior to arriving in Caracas, we stopped in a small fishing village on the Mexican coast. I was careful not to eat that day in Mexico, as we had delicious "safe" food on the ship. However I became very thirsty, and drank a cold juice on the beach. The next day, we arrived in Caracas (the port is LaGuira) and decided to take a 10 hour tour of the city. We boarded a nicely air-conditioned bus with a toilet in the back. Unfortunately, it was "out of service". The tour guide gave us the itinerary, which included only 2 stops with restrooms; the other stops had no facilities. The first part of our trip was to be the longest, and included one of the most spectacular mountain drives from the coast to the city. It also included one of the longest tunnels on earth. Well, as soon as we cleared the docks, I began to experience the most intense cramping on earth!!
  I asked the driver to pull over because I had diarrhea, but he chuckled and pointed to the side of the road saying, "its a 5,000 meter drop off on either side of the road, and there is no stopping in the tunnels.  I managed to sit on my hands for several hours. Passengers on the bus took up a collection of Lomotil for me, and I lasted 4 1/2 hours.
  I arrived at the first bathroom station covered in sweat an extremely weak; my dad helped me off the bus at Simon Bolivar Square in downtown Caracas. Everybody on the bus knew I was in pain, so they let me get off first. The bathrooms were in the basement of this public square, they were extremely filthy, had no toilet seats, and no toilet paper. A repairman was in the stall next to me, unclogging a toilet. My dad stood guard at the door while I relieved myself. He took up a collection of Kleenex and paper towels for me to use from the men waiting to use the toilet. I flushed and was done. Suddenly, all of my waste (and there was a lot of it), began to overflow onto the floor where everyone could see it. The repairman began screaming at me (in Spanish) pointing to the sign that said "Do not put paper in toilet, it will clog". He pushed everyone out of the room and closed the toilet. Needless to say, I made NO friends on that bus.

Amazon River
  A few years back I went on a river cruise of the Amazon.  When we signed up the brochures stated modern rooms with complete bathrooms.  I should've known!  First, when I walked in and bumped into the air conditioner having a two inch clump of gunk fall off of it, that I was in for trouble.  Next, I go to use the bathroom, it smelled as if someone had already been there and not flushed.  I did my duty, putting the toilet paper in a basket not the toilet, and went back up top.  I had to ask why the smell and unfortunately was told, the water for the toilets is from the river and what we flush goes back into the river.  Then I was politely informed that the water for the showers comes from the same place.  Thank goodness they had bottled water available, I definitely went through more than my share!

Mexico
  While in Mexico City on my high school senior mission trip our class was warned of many things including pick-pockets and not eating the food. Our chaperones, however, forgot to tell us anything about the bathrooms. Sixteen people were staying in a dorm style house with 4 bathrooms and within a day we had stopped them all up. We then went to visit a church whose bathroom we proceeded to stop up. After that we were asking our chaperones why the bathroom at the church smelled so bad and they realized what they had forgotten to tell us: you can't flush the toilet paper in Mexico City because the sewer system is so bad.  Because of this all the bathrooms are equipped with trashcans into which one deposits their used toilet paper. You can imagine the smell.
  We were also instructed to care toilet paper with us at all times since it tended to get stolen in public bathrooms. I'm not sure why though, because all the people we saw in the markets used the sidewalk rather than the facilities.

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